Conversations and Proclamations

There are few things in life so delightful as seriously conversing with the very young. Allow me to demonstrate.

Here is a conversation Ruhi and I had in the car on the way home from school. They had been learning about the Middle East and the mother of one of her classmates had brought in some items to share and talk about the time that she spent as a nurse in Saudi Arabia, which Ruhi had interpreted as Israel (you will witness the relevance of her telling me that in a moment). Ruhi was explaining and describing some of the things that she had seen like a prayer shawl of some sort and a special candle holder that held a whole bunch of candles in a row. So, out of curiosity, I innocently asked: "Oh, are they Jewish?" (Referring to her classmate and family and thinking how wonderful it would be if they were - you know diversity and all...) Ruhi, referring to the candle holder, looked at me as though a most voluptuous walrus had just popped out of my nose and said: "No Mum... They're solid silver." Indeed.

Anisa, with her characteristic charm and enthusiasm, proclaimed one day after breakfast and entirely out of the blue: "You know Mum, one day I'm gonna grow up and I'm gonna be big and I'm gonna have a baby in my tummy and I'm gonna have big boobies and I'm gonna make milk and I'm gonna be a cow! Just. like. YOU!" Um - thanks honey. (I think Mehran has been secretly hoping she'd become a doctor, but you know - cows are good too.)

While Bayan carries on delightfully random conversations that take so many twists and turns that it's quite crucial to pay very close attention or else you never know where you might end up.

Bayan: "Mum, Mum, Mummy I have a tummy ache in my throat and my toes hurt in my tummy."

Me: "Your toes hurt in your tummy?"

Bayan: "Yes! Look Mummy! You see de cat? I like cats. Cats are funny!"

Me: "Oh, I missed the cat. What color was it?"

Bayan: "I fink (think) was black. See mummy, see!" (holding up a toy car) "Car goes brrrrmmmm!" (excellent sound effects)

Me: "That's a nice car Bayan."

Bayan: "Yes. Here is broken. We need some sticky tape to fix it."

Me: "I don't think I have any sticky tape with me."

Bayan: "Yes, yes you do. We have sticky tape."

Me: "Yes we have sticky tape at home but not in the car. How about if I give you some tape when we get home?"

Bayan: "Mummy space is dark?"

Me: "Yes Bayan, space is very dark. How is your tummy?"

Bayan: "What?"

Here he is having an intimate chat with Chipper the squirrel (or as Bayan would say, the squirreler. He has taken to adding the suffix -er to the ends of various words like stool and hole so that they become stooler and holer respectively. I find it immensely charming.) And here are Anisa and Ruhi conversing with nameless (so far as we know) crustaceans. They were formally introduced before making a special appearance at dinner. Bayan wanted no part of it. I suppose it is rather savage. I must look for more vegetarian recipes.